what may or may not be hard reality

Found on the back of an old shopping list in a corner of my bag:

"It feels like forever. There are no clocks on the ship. The computer can time experiments that are time-sensitive, and for everything else people sort of keep their own pace."

I wonder whose POV it is. I wonder what ship it is. The Oddyssey? Moya? Serenity? Antares? The Love Boat? But surely they all have clocks... maybe there's been a malfunction and they've been stranded (whoever they are)? But the fact that it "feels" like forever implies that it's not actually forever, so are they going somewhere far far away? I wonder if I had a pairing or a plot in mind... intriguing.

So it's November again, National Novel-Writing Month... but I don't write novels. However, for the somethingth time in a row, I'm trying to at least write a drabble each day (which lasted for all of one day, but I'm back on track again on day 3 now).

My sister asked me a little while ago how much of what I write in my writing/fanfic journal that I post. I said not much, and explained how a lot of the stuff is never finished, and a lot of the stuff kinda sucks, and a lot of the stuff is just silly and only written down because it amuses me and isn't actually credible scenes that are true to the characters. So she asked me why I bothered writing it down if I already know I'll never post it, if I already have the story in my head. Which is a valid question, actually, I used to wonder about that too. What is it that makes me sit down and put pen to paper and write out a scene that I know I'll never post?

And I explained how partly it's because it doesn't feel real until it's actually written out, but more importantly things happen sometimes when I put pen to paper. How regardless of how much I plan in my head beforehand, other things happen when I write it out. My sister's a dancer, so I likened it to her working on a choreography, and having to listen to the music and actually move through the steps in order to be inspired. Even if she has an idea of how she wants the final performance to look this can still change when she's out there moving through it. And it's the same with writing. When I write I'll have either a clear starting point in mind, or a specific moment of the direction, sometimes just a line of dialogue or a description, but not until I put pen to paper does the plot (if you can call it that when it's less than 500 words) unfold itself.

Often, there's failure. My starting point collapses in on itself and nothing happens. Or everything evolves into complete out-of-character ridiculousness that's fun for me to write, but still pointless. However, ever so rarely, something incredible happens. I start out in one place and it just happens, and the story evolves and takes on color and significance and the characters do things I didn't know they were capable of (not to be confused with profound or important). That happened to me today. It was very very cool. Of course, now I'm stuck with a completely confusing piece where the character starts out believing one thing and turning out being a completely different kind of person. We'll see if I can untangle it and make something post-worthy out of it. Either way, I'm very excited about it!

A long and rambly post wherein I am curious about all the gray areas of RPF. If anyone knows of other posts on this subject, please link me?

( On the nature of RealPeopleFic )

This was almost ready to post this yesterday, but then I had a palm vs. hot pan incident and typing was annoying for most of the day after that. Think!fail. It's better today, in that falsely comforting way burns get the first few days before the skin starts to peel and it hurts again.

from wizened_cynic a ( 2009 fic meme review thing )

OMG epiphany!! Heh. I start off by saying how much I prefer writing, and then I completely fail at writing a coherent post.

( which is why there's a cut, under here are ramblings about the directing-epiphany I had the other day... references Sanctuary 2x07, but no spoilers, I promise )

Also, Meredith Baxter came out yesterday! OMG! I had *such* a crush on her when I was little. For a good two months when I was around 10, Elyse Keaton was the prettiest woman in the whole wide world. I had friends who were like 'I wanna be cool like Mallory!', or 'Alex is so cute!', and I was all 'My favourite scene was that one with Elyse in the kitchen, because she's the prettiest woman alive!', only I didn't say that out loud. See, again, I had no idea I was gay, but I was vaguely aware of the fact that it was best to keep such opinions to myself. And she's gay. Which makes my inner child just die of *swoon*. And more grown-up me is pissed off that she was forced to come out but also in awe of the graceful way she handled it. Go Meredith!

The danger of writing for a fandom where most of the fic sucks is that you get caught in their stupidity. All these things that I cringe at and rant about when I read, I find myself writing, because it somehow fits the vocabulary and style I have come to associate with fandom. Like somehow everything else being crap justifies me not even trying to write something I can stand for instead of something that passes for ok because it's no worse than everything else. Blerg.

from mylittleredgirl, stolen with her amendments and all:

The first TEN people to comment in this post get to request a drabble of any pairing/character of their choosing from me. In return, they have to post this in their journal, regardless of their ability level. If you absolutely can't write, I don't see why you wouldn't be able to offer drawings or icons or something instead.  You know, if you want to. :) (But I kinda want you to. But I won't request from you until I've finished your drabble.)

If you suggest a show or character I don't know, I'll let you know and you can suggest again. If you want to, throw in a random word to aid in muse navigation, but the internets can always provide me with random words if necessary.

Ooooooh... Damn it! Why wasn't I in LA last night?????

Unrelatedly, like an answer to my prayers, cross_my_heart's Anti-Valentine Ficathon. So far there aren't any specific prompts to my liking, but since it's not tied to the prompts I can just steal whatever and write for whatever pairing I like. Hmm... choices, choices. And creativity. Come on, muse.

Does anyone know a good prompt-table, or old ficathon prompt list that was good, or some such? I don't necessarily wanna sign up for an actual challenge, but just to use for inspiration. I've been poking around a few different prompt-challenge-tables, but they're all so boring. Writing for a prompt like 'touch' can be nice, of course, but I don't really need a prompt at all for that fic, and you have to be super-creative and do something unusual and exciting with it, and I'm not feeling that creative, so I'd like a bunch of nicely creative and unusual prompts. I need good starting points.

Alternatively, reply to this post with random odd and unusual prompts? Please?

So apparently femslash has its own day now. And there's a bunch of stuff going on, and all kinds of challenges and ficathons and whatever, but I'm gonna pimp this one. Because dudes, crossovers own my heart, and I'm gonna *try* to write something, I really will, but also? I will write prompts. Mmmm, prompts. (And also, this ficathon immediately got on my good side by having in its first prompt-example a character played by Christina, and then the first prompter's first prompt also had a character played by Christina. Go Christina!!)

And my Epic (yeah yeah, shut up, I'm a drabble person) Queen Slash Fic just passed 5000 words! Wooot! (I just wish the EP♥AG would flow with the same ease... 2196 words to date, and 228 of those are plot. Ehem.)

The WTF27 isn't quite where I'd hoped it would be, either. I'm gonna do my best to get the ones with requested characters up by Friday, but there's a few with just my own characters that might be a few days delayed. Please don't skin me alive. (Not that you would, you know, considering it's my own challenge, and all that, but still...) I had no idea the traveling I've done would leave so little time for writing. My goodness. But I was never left alone, and the muse tends to walk out on me after a few distractions like this:

( Now, spreading the word is a good thing, but does anyone else just want to strangle the nth person asking about what on earth fanfic is? )

Mmm, the second and final part of Category 7: The End of the World tonight. And dude, it was just as good, if not better, than the first.

Of course, right at the very end, when CreepyCrazyOldGuy was hitting on Prue, I had a wee bit of trouble hearing what they were saying, due to extremities blocking parts of the sound, and a weird humming noise interfering with the rest. I think it went something like this, though:

CreepyCrazyOldGuy: So, lay it on me. I'm tough, I can take it. Do I stand any chance with you?
Prue: No, you don't stand any chance with me at all...
CreepyCrazyOldGuy: *disappointed look*
Prue: ...because my girlfriend would be really pissed off.
CreepyCrazyOldGuy: *disappointed look* becomes *speculative look* Can I watch?
Prue: No.

And then he kissed her goodbye on the mouth, because they'd been through a lot and close to death together, and they went their separate ways. Yes. That's exactly what happened.