what may or may not be hard reality

Waaaaaaaaah!!!

I just watched last night's Sanctuary and it made me cry. A lot. In a good way. Or you know, in a bad way, but it was good. And sad. And awful.

Is Ashley really gone?? It upsets me. Honestly, not so much for Ashley's sake, she's a cool kick-ass chick, but it upsets me for Helen's sake. It'll be interesting to see her go through losing her daughter, but mostly I wanted to see their relationship evolve with, you know, both of them alive.

Now my eyes are red and I look bloated. And I have a wedding to go to in two hours.

If I was writing the fanfic the moment where Ashley blasts herself and that other chick into oblivion, it would only be a momentary clarity, she remembers who she really is, and she remembers what she's done recently, and she realizes the brainwashing will take over again any second, and so she takes herself out of the equation not just to save her mother right then, but to save them from herself in the future as well.

Because otherwise Helen should really have shot that other chick and let Ashley be. She had the power-weapon right there. Or wasn't it focused enough that she could shoot only one of them?

I'm calming myself down by watching their Comic-Con panel from earlier this year. Amanda Tapping is adorable. *squee*